i miss home today. just really miss it. its still hot here..i miss the fall colors and the changing temps...:-(

i went through a period of time where i wasn’t sure that I believed in God. I recently realized, that although i may not have all the answers about how God works, I know that there is a God. And I thank him that I realized this before yesterday.

sept 11th 2001...a date which will live in infamy.

there isn’t anything that I can say. This is the worst thing ever. All the life lost. :-(

ever have a weird dream......and then you wake up feeling all weird and odd?....well I had those types of dreams Saturday night.....and I’ve been feeling quite odd since then. I can’t even really explain it well.
I’ve been haunted by finding people I haven’t talked to in forever.

I haven’t spoken to Bill McE in a little under a year...but I wouldn’t even know where to start if i wanted to look for him. The only email addy I have for him doesn’t work. I know he used to use AOL but I can’t seem to find him that way either. Oh well...I guess it’s not meant to be

Dustin Ray Engle. Would have NO idea how to find him. Haven’t seen or spoken to him in probably...4 years. He lived with friends and even the friends have moved away. I just wonder how his life is going...and how he is doing. Is he happy...does he remember me?

Bill the tree farmer. How cryptic he was. How much he looked like David Boreanaz from the show Angel. (I knew Bill the tree farmer long before I knew who David was.) I never really knew who Bill was...and took forever for us to even be “semi” friends...I was too young. Then I moved away.
Both were in my dream on Saturday. But they were the same person...in the dream..both someone I was searching for...and found in different places when I looked…

life is bittersweet. if there hadn’t been certain choices made how would life be different now? Would I be happy...would they be happy? How much would life be changed? Regret is a useless emotion. I don’t think I am regretting anything....just wondering how different life could be.