once when i was small i cried.
i cried and cried.
i was very sad.
i don’t remember why.
i just was probably crying for no reason.

yeah. i still do that.

All originally written April 7th 2006. In a notebook/diary of sorts that no one has ever read besides me. I was 17 years old. I was a senior in highshcool. These boys I wrote these letters to, never saw them. Each handwritten in a different color marker.

**Not the boys real name.

Yesterday I wrote a lil bit about my past on the radio.  I was actually on my college station for about a year, but the obsession, if you wanna call it that, started long before that.  Mostly likely because my father is also a, what I am going to call, a Radio Entertainer!  He’s got his own 2 hour show on KKFI (90.1 FM Kansas City’s community station), called 71 Highway on Tuesday Nites from 10-midnight CST.) When I was growing up he was a DJ at parties and weddings, and I also remember him doing some work at commercial stations.  I did get to go with him sometimes, and I always thought it was the the coolest thing! It wasn’t long before I was making mix tapes, with my own “dj chatter” recorded in between.  I wish I had some of those tapes now!  When I was in high school I got involved in the Drama club, and showhow I was able to fanagle myself into being involved with the sound track selection for nearly every program my Junior and Senior year.  Like - for our Winter Holiday Program I picked music that represented every winter Holiday. Or at least as best I could without the true vastness of the internets, like I’ve got now! ;-) For my senior program - a requirement of Drama II - i spent nearly as much time on the musical interludes as I did on picking the pieces I was to perform!  It’s just always something that was fun for me - putting together play-list/soundtracks for whatever.  Sometime in my sophomore year of college my friend Jeff - and hubbies room mate and best since 1st grade, convinced me to take into Broad Op, and then join the Radio Practicum.  I was on the Production Team for a while, making commercials and promos - and also on the Exec Board for a while serving as the web designer.  My first semester on air I did a co-show with Jeff on Friday nites - all request with hardly a playlist. It was insane fun. We got to pick the music ourselves for the most part, and we had loads of fun talking and goofin off!  At some point I got involved with another show on the station - I did a semester with a dude named Ash - he was the guy and I was the girl. It was mostly the same sort of stuff as with Jeff, just that Ash and Jeff were a little deferent personality wise ;-) I had a lot of fun on that show too though.  I enjoyed most of my time at the station - the events and the parties.  I did loads of commercials and promos, and I used to have a lot of them on tape - but I think they’re been lost now. :-( Which is prolly good, cause I certainly think I’m better on air now. Plus - the music is better ;-)

p.s Notice the new Skin. It’s called a bright and sexy fall. It’s the new default and the first one in the pull down menu.  Hope you like it! :-)

The summer before 4th grade I gave myself a haircut.  I tried triming my bangs and I just couldn’t get them straight.  Not being one to give up and stick with uneven bangs I kept going.  I kept going all the way until I had NO bangs left. I just had this little patch of hair in the front. I was wearing the rest of my hair long at the time too. So I had these shock short bangs, and this long wild light brown hair.  Luckily my hair grows out pretty fast, cause this is my 4th grade picture.  Taken sometime in September, maybe even October. I remember crying and crying and crying when I realized what I’d done to my hair. I thought I looked so stupid and was mad at myself for letting it get that far.  I remember going to a family event with my aunts and uncles and there being this boy there, who was a friend of the family (not related to me, I’m from Missouri Not Alabama) and trying to forget how stupid my hair looked.  Yeah, I could have worn a hat, but I hated how my ears stick out when I wear one of those. I couldn’t win with that.  Lookin at that picture again, wow, they were still really short.  And they were growing out at weird angles, and I couldn’t curl them or anything.  I remember trying to find something really nice to wear for the pictures too, so as to distract from the horrible hair.  Yay, that didn’t work so much.  :-) You ever have a bad self haircut? I’d LOVE to hear about it, so put it in the comments! :-)

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